Are my parents going to get a divorce ?

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Hey,

I’m 18 and a senior in high school. My parents are late 50s-60…And my dad mentioned a divorce today. Not by name, but still. And the more I think about it being possible the more terrified I am.

I mean, my parents do fight, but usually it’s when my mother is in a rotten mood for something I’ve done. I guess they’re never disney-worthy giddy together, but….They’ve been married for over 20 years. I would think they’d be out of the lovey dovey stage. And usually it’s not that bad because my dad always backs down. Lately they’ve been fighting because I pissed my mom off majorly and then my dad got some news about his heart that was potentially not good.

I’m going to college in the fall, and it’s about 3 hours from our house- I’ve always figured that, seeing as I’m the one who usually makes my mom mad, my absence would make things easier at home, and perhaps improve their relationship. But divorce being brought up makes me think that it might be too late.

I know it’s not a lot to go on, but do you think it’s just a spat or if it’s the beginning of the end? Do things generally get better between parents once the kid is out of the house? I’m an only child. Should I suggest couple’s counseling?

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Do not suggest couples counseling. It will just piss them both off and neither of them will go. Being in college may ease some tension, but trust me, it’s not all about you. They will still fight even when you’re three hours away. I thought I was the source of all evil in my family but even with me in a different country, they still fought. It seems like just another spat, besides you have to actually think about the energy involved in getting a divorce. Would they really go through all the trouble at their age? Also, would a divorce really be that bad? People tend to be a lot nicer to people they no longer live with or see on a daily basis. I work so much better with my family now that I am in college, I appreciate them so much more. It’s made me realize what I have now that I no longer live at home. I think my dad is the same way. It’s a long story, but my dad lives in another country right now (no, my parents are not divorced) and he acts a lot nicer toward us when we’re together in the summers. Being apart can work wonders for a relationship.

Parents allude to divorces way more times then they actually act in getting them.

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